Gone Bloggin'

Will's parents are rebuilding their house at Lake Martin. Building a house from scratch is no easy task. Of course, they have both had "if we'd known, we would've.." or "well, we probably should've..." thoughts as it's come together (and too late to change). So, Jan, in her effort to deal with the house that's being built has decided to adopt the attitude, "It's exactly as we wanted it." She is letting the house be what it is going to be...

This reminds me of a mantra that a wise friend of mine taught me:

Be open to what happens and remain unattached to outcome.

I always get in the wrong lane of traffic or the wrong check-out line at the store. I'm sure this happens to you, too. When this happens, I get irritated, impatient, and frustrated. But, that's because I have these expectations that a lane should move along and I should be checked out quickly. I'm attached to that outcome. Like I can control the other cars or traffic lights or the check-out person or the old lady in front of me who has to write a check and can't find her driver's license and goes through everything in her purse to produce some kind of identification...

It sounds strange to say, "Don't set expectations." But think about it, as soon as you have expectations, then you set yourself up for disappointment. When you don't have your mind set on how something SHOULD be, then you can be open to what it COULD be, which might actually be better than what you imagined. When you're open, you participate fully in life...rather than trying to control it. For humankind, it's all about control anyway (or an illusion of control)...and so often we spend our energy trying to control things we can't (like other people, traffic, results, etc.)

So, now I'm starting to philosophize. It's what I've learned in my faith journey. It's by letting go that we become truly in control of our lives and free ourselves to live. It's by not attaching ourselves to something external, that we can truly allow life to unfold in amazing ways. It doesn't mean we stop aspiring or having visions...it means that as we're faithfully pursuing our dreams and goals, we're open to the other things that come and we're open to the fact that what ends up happening may be very different and that different is wonderful.

Just like the lakehouse. Really, it's not the structure that's important anyway, right, but the memories we make in it.